Our girls Bo (Anna Silk) and Kenzi (Ksenia Solo) have a bug problem in a delicious twist on the haunted house. Plus, this is the first time that Bo plays no part in saving herself. Are we happy with this new development?
Let’s bitch it out…
Case of the week: Four murder/suicides caused by a giant, nasty spider called Djieiene, “a nomadic Under Fae” whose bite causes paranoia, agoraphobia, fear and itchiness (for good measure?). Naturally Bo and Kenzi are bitten and the spider psychically traps them in the house to spiral further and further into psychosis and murderous rage (muah ha ha!). Things go from bad to worst as the Ash’s new head of security, Serena (Lisa Berry) puts the house under quarantine with plans to go ‘Firestarter’ on it. Trouble is the Djieiene hides its heart and until that’s found the spider is indestructible, forcing Lauren (Zoie Palmer) and Dyson (Kris Holden-Ried) to work together to save Bo, Kenzi, and Hale (K.C. Collins).
Undercover Stints: Kenzi’s side-venture as a Shaman produces hysterical (if slightly unbelievable) results. What realtor in their right mind would let that crazy gypsy lady into a house?
Kenzi Hair-o-meter: The babushka blonde wig Kenzi uses for her Shaman house cleansing is pretty terrible. Why is she repurposing the blonde sorority wig from ‘Oh Kappa, My Kappa’ to play a gypsy? Every Disney movie I’ve ever seen has told me that the hankerchief on the head is a yes, but the dreamcatcher and blonde wig is a no.
Bo Personal development: Nada. The girls are too busy trying to kill each other to explore Bo’s history.
Sexnanigans: How about a super awkward ‘threesome’ between Bo, Lauren and Dyson on the couch of the Dal? I loved the jealousy between the competing lovers (particularly Lauren’s ‘Were you leaving?” when she sees Dyson hanging with Lauren). The rivalry heats up when Dyson gets roped into a physical by Lauren that’s full of lightly barbed jabs at each other’s relationship with Bo before being forced to work together.
- What’s funnier: that Bo’s dark fae contact is named Sigfried? Or that Kenzi regularly watches a television show called Jungle Jeeves?
- Is it rape when Bo feeds on Hale while he’s unconscious – cause I’m pretty sure that he didn’t give his consent (despite suggesting that she tastes like “apricots”). Considering he’s a bit of a misogynist, maybe the girls feeding on him and whacking him with a frying pan (twice) is appropriate?
- Once again, Trick (Rick Howland) gets a nice cameo wherein he provides vital info to Lauren and Dyson about the Under Fae. I’m still waiting for more Trick – he must be due for his own episode shortly, right?
- More fodder for the boys (and girls who like girls) as Kenzi and Lauren play tongue-doctor in Bo’s hallucination. Hot or just weird? I’m Team Lauren, but Ksenia Solo is too skinny (and hungry for pizza delivery guys) for that ‘shipping’ combination to ever work.
Best lines of the night:
>Kenzi (grabbing a random axe lying around): “Were you planning to chop some wood?”
>Hale (responding to Dixon’s inquiry about suspicious activity): “Like a bright yellow suck-mobile?”
>Kenzi (about Lauren): “I thought she fixed your hungry honey pot?”
>Kenzi (to Bo as they both suffer from spider bite migraines): “Did you bring home elves last night?”
>Kenzi: “And can we please talk about your hair?”
Did you think it was interesting that Bo was able to overcome the electron range of the Djieiene after feeding on Hale? How true were the insults everyone was lobbing at each other – whether they were out of paranoia or jealousy – there was clearly so pent up aggression mixed in, right? Finally, does Dyson really have a reason for not trusting Lauren? Is it truly because of her work with the Ash or is it something else?